TBTL (Too Beautiful to Live) is a daily weekday podcast from Luke Burbank and co-host/producer Andrew Walsh. It is about life, current events, popular culture, puttering, serial boat ownership, and night pants. Hotline: (206) 414-8285


Episode #2053: Polishing Our Own Squirrel Horns

February 11, 2016 · Duration: 1:30:45 · Play

Luke and Andrew talk shoes, fashion, and other topics that are beyond them, including: How to handle Valentines Day when you hate Valentines Day, the O.J. Simpson trial, Baby Jessica, and why a California congressman was vaping on the floor of the House.

Episode #2052: Stop The Glodsanity!

February 10, 2016 · Duration: 1:23:18 · Play

MSNBC’s Chris Hayes went viral last night after introducing America to a new, tasty political candidate. He joins the show to explain what happened. Plus, food talk continues with a story of a McDonald’s marketing ploy gone bad, and [HOT DOG STORY ALERT] Burger King introduces a new, tubular item to its menu with the help of Snoop Dogg. Also, Andrew tries out a new radio voice that you’re going to find very unsettling.

Episode #2051: One And Half Articles

February 9, 2016 · Duration: 1:39:53 · Play

Andrew’s big announcement — delayed by one day — is finally revealed. Also, Luke tells the story of one of the most fascinating heists in recent years, and listeners explain why they disagree with us about Cam Newton.

Episode #2050: One Does Not Simply Get To The Point

February 8, 2016 · Duration: 1:20:42 · Play

Luke and Andrew discuss yesterday’s Super Bowl commercials, whether or not it’s okay to root against Cam Newton, and how it took a listener five years to finally listen to TBTL. There is also an amazing joke about Jason Bourne that will probably change the face of comedy forever.

Episode #2049: The Hunt For Fresh October

February 5, 2016 · Duration: 1:35:19 · Play

Luke and Andrew deliver a true Friday show. Topics include: Standing in line at 7-11, license plate fonts (again), Luke’s long-lost half-brother and a grandma he never got to meet, airplane food, Andrew’s big Facebook mea culpa, sparkling water vs still water, and why we lost a listener this week. Plus, Music for Your Weekend!

Episode #2048: Please Clap

February 4, 2016 · Duration: 1:23:00 · Play

Chris Hayes joins the show from New Hampshire, where primary voting is just days away and Jeb Bush is becoming more likable by the minute. Plus, Luke and Andrew discuss whether or not we should enjoy shows like “Serial” and “Making a Murderer”.

Episode #2047: It’s Not A Scuber!

February 3, 2016 · Duration: 1:25:19 · Play

Luke is high on life after organizing a bunch of cables in his studio, but he’s also angry about a speeding ticket that a robot camera issued him. Andrew, meanwhile, has a new idea for the folks at Uber. He also met a guy who met Susan Sarandon once. And we continue our celebration of Groundhog Day with a rodent mystery.

Episode #2046: BMI TMI

February 2, 2016 · Duration: 1:12:57 · Play

Andrew has a list of famous groundhogs and he insists on sharing it, whether you like it or not. Luke, meanwhile, has a new reason not to exercise (but that doesn’t mean he’s going to stop.) Plus, the only tape of the very first Super Bowl has been discovered, but no one is allowed to see it, sell it, or do anything with it.

Episode #2045: They Don’t Make Femurs Like They Used To

February 1, 2016 · Duration: 1:34:29 · Play

Luke and Andrew discuss why insane jealousy makes Luke want to be a lawyer and Andrew want to stare at blank walls all day. Plus, a new and improved highway sign font is being rescinded, and the internet is mad at a couple of dudes who want to make money from their web series.

Episode #2044: Daddy Was A Rolling Soap Box

January 29, 2016 · Duration: 1:12:31 · Play

Luke and Andrew discuss PETA’s supposed plans to turn the Silence of the Lambs house into an “empathy museum”. Plus, Andrew wants a 92-year old neighbor to play cards with, and Luke is going to have to stand in line to say hello to one of his famous co-workers.

Episode #2043: WaWaMa

January 28, 2016 · Duration: 1:04:51 · Play

Luke and Andrew spend a lot of time trying to come up with words based on official state abbreviations. They also discuss Luke’s decision not to steal a joke, Russell Wilson’s attempt at written romance, and the difference between being “aloof” and “confident.”

Episode #2042: Beef And Frank

January 27, 2016 · Duration: 1:05:46 · Play

The beef between flat-earth enthusiast / mid-level rapper B.O.B. and scientist Neil DeGrasse Tyson just got a little bit hotter. Luke and Andrew review the latest diss track in the feud. Plus, a white actor has been hired to play Michael Jackson in an upcoming movie, and Frank Stallone isn’t getting the respect he deserves.

Episode #2041: I Will Fight You, Moby!

January 26, 2016 · Duration: 1:23:36 · Play

Luke and Andrew discuss the fight between rapper B.O.B., who believes the earth is flat, and scientist Neil Degrasse Tyson, who is not crazy. Plus, Luke examines 7 signs that Andrew might be unlikable. And then there’s the humble bragging. Oh, is there a lot of humble bragging in today’s show.

Episode #2040: Leave No Lemon Spice Behind

January 25, 2016 · Duration: 1:17:52 · Play

Luke is bacheloring it up while his wife is travelling, and in his case, that means looking at pictures of tents while watching football games. Meanwhile, Andrew is taught a new way to eat sausage. They discuss this and also a tweet that has Andie MacDowell coming under fire and a dog who inadvertently ran a half-marathon.

Episode #2039: The Old Man Express Out Of Cool Town

January 22, 2016 · Duration: 1:15:32 · Play

Andrew attended a Dave Chappelle show at a salsa club last night, and he’s still in shock over what happened. He and Luke talk about that, and Phyllis “Fletch” Fletcher explains why she’s joining the dirtiest, most smoke-filled Eagles club in the country. Plus, what to do about a coworker who won’t stop asking you if it’s Friday yet.

Episode #2038: Literally No Show Title

January 21, 2016 · Duration: 1:30:13 · Play

Luke joins the show from the back of an Uber in Chicago, where he and his driver, Wilson, search for his hotel. Andrew, from his usual perch in Koreatown, has been experimenting with new kinds of food and has an update. Plus: scientists have created a casino for rodents, and an Atlanta couple are being bombarded by people who think they stole their cell phones.

Episode #2037: Out Of The Blue Tang Clan

January 20, 2016 · Duration: 1:21:46 · Play

Revelations about a megastar’s own private Benihana Restaurant has Luke jealous as hell. Andrew has big plans tomorrow night and he tries to brag about them without bragging. We also play a lot of Gordon Lightfoot and discuss all those ketchup packets that you’ve been accumulating in your glove box.

Episode #2036: Get Over It, Merv Griffin

January 19, 2016 · Duration: 1:39:39 · Play

Andrew checks-in after being trapped in an “escape room” in downtown L.A. last night. He and Luke also discuss the “honey do lists” and “mancaves” of highly productive extraterrestrials, a Jeopardy! meltdown, and why the Tens say Andrew should like Randy Newman songs.

Episode #2035: The New Face Of Mischief

January 18, 2016 · Duration: 1:51:07 · Play

Andrew has accepted an offer to go on an LA adventure that combines many things that make him extremely uncomfortable. Luke wants to know why. They also discover a website that teaches them how to be funny, and they fight about Billy Joel vs. Randy Newman. Plus, they discuss the end of the Seahawks season in No Point Conversion.

Episode #2034: A Diaspora Of Tens

January 15, 2016 · Duration: 1:17:57 · Play

Luke and Andrew discuss the bizarre story of a city official who asked a bus driver to dress up like an old woman for a press conference in front of a senior center. Plus, Phyllis “Fletch” Fletcher joins us to dole out some advice to a listener who finds herself in an awkward situation. And we share some Music For Your Weekend!

Episode #2033: Beverly Hills Doc

January 14, 2016 · Duration: 1:15:54 · Play

Luke corrects the record for Andrew when it comes to one of the most popular films of the 1980s and one of the most popular fast food restaurants of the ’80s. There’s also a story involving a researcher’s notebook and an imaginary pile of poo. And we hear a bunch of songs that sample “Son of a Preacher Man.”

Episode #2032: Hoard To Taste

January 13, 2016 · Duration: 1:30:39 · Play

Luke has finally gotten his hands on the book that helped him and his family prepare for end times back in the 1980s. Andrew is suffering from a minor malady and also is curious why there haven’t been more “Blair Walsh Project” jokes on Twitter. Speaking of Blair Walsh, we hear from a bunch of little kids who are trying to cheer up the ill-fated kicker.

Episode #2031: The Baton Of Alienation

January 12, 2016 · Duration: 1:25:19 · Play

Luke joins the show from a broken down boat with a broken down computer. Andrew is mad at his neighbors and the New York Times. They also discuss Sesame Street’s upcoming season on HBO and why the email segment is scaring some listeners.

Episode #2030: Smacking of Effort

January 11, 2016 · Duration: 1:50:21 · Play

Luke and Andrew reflect on the passing of David Bowie, Sean Penn’s interview with El Chapo, and why Jim Carrey is the new Kanye West. Plus, Stu “The StuBot” Neuman joins us for a very emotional No Point Conversion.

Episode #2029: Apropos Of Not Very Much

January 8, 2016 · Duration: 1:31:10 · Play

The cosmic sounds of Donovan return to TBTL in this Friday afternoon edition of the show. Luke and Andrew also discuss the origins of the song “Once Bitten, Twice Shy” and why talk radio needs more rock and less talk. Plus, Music For Your Weekend!