TBTL (Too Beautiful to Live) is a daily weekday podcast from Luke Burbank and co-host/producer Andrew Walsh. It is about life. It is about current events. It is about popular culture. It is about Luke’s weight on that day. · Facebook · Twitter · Q&A · Contact · Song of the Summer · Email Newsletter · Ten of the Week Signup and Archive · TuneIn · Stitcher · Donate


Episode #1913: Uncomfortable Moments

July 28, 2015 · Duration: 1:20:14 · Play

Luke and Andrew swap stories about learning how to play guitar as children. Plus, former NBA star Gilbert Arenas wins big at a carnival…too big.

Episode #1912: You Kiss Your Dad With That Mouth?

July 27, 2015 · Duration: 1:33:36 · Play

Luke is embarrassed about the way he signed a text message to his dad. Andrew is excited to announce the Round 1 winners of the Song of the Summer contest. And if you have been stealing jokes on Twitter, watch out!

Episode #1911: Lovable Jabronis

July 24, 2015 · Duration: 1:03:44 · Play

Stu-Bot joins the show to review a new neighborhood Pizza Hut that fancies itself a sports bar and craft beer house. He and Luke and Andrew also discuss Frank Stallone, Hulk Hogan, and self-plagiarism.

Episode #1910: Diagnosis: Offensive

July 23, 2015 · Duration: 1:16:00 · Play

Luke had the time of his life at a Third Eye Blind concert last night. Plus, he and Andrew debate the merits of competitive scrabble and the definition of a shark attack.

Episode #1909: The Pinsky of Podcasting

July 22, 2015 · Duration: 1:17:10 · Play

Andrew goes berserker over a Song of the Summer backlash, then he and Luke devise a way to improve the contest. Plus: from vacationing to taking walks, science explains why Andrew is such a grump. And Luke learns that his 2008 pizza shop radio broadcast wasn’t as bad as he thought.

Episode #1908: Keep Your Laws Off My Splenda

July 21, 2015 · Duration: 1:18:02 · Play

Andrew gets a taste of the ritzy Hollywood healthcare system while Luke is denied his artificial sweetener of choice. Plus, Corey Feldman may be the real-life GOB Bluth, and the Gawker editorial staff makes an ethical stand over an unethical story.

Episode #1907: No Dignity, No Doubt

July 20, 2015 · Duration: 1:29:01 · Play

Luke pulls a reverse Steve McQueen (whatever that is) involving Rudy the Dog and a Motel 6, Andrew fights through otolaryngological issues, and TBTL Boss Steven Nelson critiques TBTL’s first 100 days in office as part of Infinite Guest. Plus, the TBTL Song of The Summer Contest begins!

Episode #1906: Welcome to Putter Country

July 17, 2015 · Duration: 1:12:37 · Play

Luke and Andrew sample a brand new Donovan song that just dropped yesterday. Plus, Gawker pulls a muckraking story that outs a corporate big wig. And Phyllis joins the show to explain her son’s relationship to his new TBTL dolls.

Episode #1904: 80% Doug, 20% Randy

July 15, 2015 · Duration: 1:13:05 · Play

Luke discovers a conspiracy-theory radio station that you can listen to over the phone. Andrew discovers a TV news story about his favorite restaurant. And there is much discussion of bawdy t-shirts from the 1990s.

Episode #1903: Late Stage Zumanity

July 14, 2015 · Duration: 1:04:26 · Play

Luke takes a break from sanding his boat and drinking juice to join TBTL from his parents’ driveway. Andrew takes a break from complaining about the heat and joins the show from a shady park in Los Angeles. They discuss the revelation that the entire PNW may collapse upon itself. Also, Luke’s mom updates us on her Christian cruise capers.

Episode #1902: The Second Duke of Para La Bukay

July 13, 2015 · Duration: 1:32:19 · Play

Luke says the New York Times is lying to him on their “frequently asked questions” page. He also says we all need to calm down about Atticus Finch and Happy Meal toys. Meanwhile, Andrew tries to talk a listener off the edge and accidentally kills a beloved cartoonist.

Episode #1901: Montana Microcast

July 10, 2015 · Duration: 52:25 · Play

Luke joins the show from the side of the road, somewhere in Montana, with a dying computer battery and a dirty pair of shorts. He updates Andrew on his adventures, and then they discuss what they will do when his battery dies. Which, of course, it does.

Episode #1900: Say Hello To My Little Crêpe

July 9, 2015 · Duration: 1:09:17 · Play

“Ask Amy” advice columnist Amy Dickinson recently fell for a prank based on the worst film ever made. She joins the show to explain what happened and to take this week’s TBTL quiz. Plus, Luke and Andrew discuss coffee shop time limits and the highest-profile donut scandal since Golden Tate got the munchies.

Episode #1899: Check The Pleats

July 8, 2015 · Duration: 1:07:36 · Play

Luke joins the show from Infinite Guest headquarters in St. Paul, Minnesota. He and Andrew discuss surprise pleats, the science of narcissism, and a story involving Magnum P.I. and a fire hydrant.

Episode #1898: North Of Our Understanding

July 7, 2015 · Duration: 1:22:35 · Play

Luke joins the show from Madison, Wisconsin, as his road trip across the country continues. He and Andrew discuss Pizza Hut protocols, a man who flew through the sky on a homemade balloon chair, and Luke’s conspiracy theory involving a Broadway puppet show.

Episode #1897: A Buick Encore And A Dream

July 6, 2015 · Duration: 1:21:39 · Play

After a series of misadventures, Luke hits the road in a rented Buick Encore and begins a journey across the United States of America. He checks-in from Kendallville, Indiana, where he may be renting Corky St. Clair’s apartment. Plus, he and Andrew announce the details of the 2015 Song of the Summer contest!

Episode #1896: Adam and Steve and Brandi

July 3, 2015 · Duration: 1:09:59 · Play

Luke is back! He joins us from the Chautauqua Institution in western New York. Andrew offers him advice on how to handle a road trip with Robert Pinsky and how to survive a 4th of July weekend alone. Plus: guacamole controversies, bubble wrap nontroversies, and a debate over polyamory.

Episode #1895: It Takes A Lot To Make A Clunker

July 2, 2015 · Duration: 1:02:20 · Play

Stu “The Stu-Bot” Neuman joins Andrew to talk about the latest bit of brilliance from Stephen Colbert, who took over a cable access talk show in remote Michigan. Plus, the origins of a joke about ping pong balls, an awkward interview with an angry football coach, and a movie trivia game like no other.

Episode #1894: Big Meaty Paws

July 1, 2015 · Duration: 1:01:37 · Play

Stu “The Stu-Bot” Neuman joins the show today to discuss the correlation between water parks and ill-advised tattoos. Public radio celebrity John Moe stops by to chat about his new podcast all about the cartoon “Adventure Time.” Plus, the name of a dog has Stu hopping mad, even though he doesn’t want to be angry on Canada Day.

Episode #1893: What To Expect When Expecting A Podcast

June 30, 2015 · Duration: 1:15:01 · Play

Luke checks in from NEW YORK CITY (?!) to talk about his experience at an adult summer camp he visited recently. Plus, he and Andrew discuss drones falling from the sky and the poopiest race in the world. And they also dissect the latest episode of True Detective, probably for the last time.

Episode #1892: Portraits In Over-Thinking It

June 29, 2015 · Duration: 1:08:44 · Play

Andrew and Phyllis take over the show today to talk about proper employee management techniques and the difference between a muumuu and a housecoat. Plus, TBTL breaks its silence on the Supreme Court’s same-sex marriage ruling and why a seemingly unpopular album is topping the charts.

Episode #1891: Bros Before HR

June 26, 2015 · Duration: 1:00:27 · Play

MSNBC’s Chris Hayes joins the show to receive the prestigious “TBTL Profiles In Going For It Award.” Plus, he and Luke face off against Quizmaster Andrew in a battle over obscure flag knowledge. And Luke’s mom Susie explains how she plans to crash a Christian gathering on the high seas.

Episode #1890: Just the FAQs

June 25, 2015 · Duration: 1:13:54 · Play

Luke and Andrew explain a new TBTL experiment they’re about to undertake. Plus, one of the world’s most famous pop-artists is wanted in Detroit, and Ben Affleck’s racist ancestor is causing problems for public broadcasting.